living with RX has its downsides.. ups.. upside..
And how would you know that, if you were not Amazon-King? In fact, did you know that Amazon-King signs most of his PMs "EK" when he thinks no one will notice.
I did not ask Antz or ANYONE ELSE to ghost. In fact, I don't remember ghosting, TBH. There is a reason why you don't combine Xanax, Ambien, and Vodka after a very bad business trip and no sleep. Especially after the client changes their answer before you even get home. I will totally admit that I should have gone right to be, I over-reacted to PMs in my mailbox, and I made a big mistake and let my team down. I will say it here in front of you.
My team, and particularly James, did not deserve it. My RL job is in a pretty bad place right now and I could lose it, due to the national situation with healthcare. For almost two years I have done nothing but support this team and every decision James has made. I had reservations about playing a fast/no-morale server because of arrogant assholes like A-K and his group, but I now James also has RL commitments that make it difficult to always have my back. Still, I tried to do everything he had in mind for OUR alliance, every step of the way.
Amazon-King and his people knew I did not support their existence as a separate group outside James's leadership. I made no secret of it. So it diid not really surprise me when they started hazing me in the chat and in private. What I did not appreciate was being attached at all hours BY MY OWN TEAM to try to bring me in line with their agenda. I would have shut that down earlier but James is the Founder of TF and I follow his lead. We agreed on this long before Pagasae opened. My frustration was not in what they were doing, but my inability to shut it down until James and VonL were ready.
When I got home, I should have gone to bed, since I had been taking prescription medications after the poor results from the meeting. I added alcohol to the equation, which was not helpful. I misinterpreted some PMs and left a message in James's skype, which I can only imagine got the same response -- affected by substances and RL.
Anyway, I have never, ever, ever said one word against James. I believe in him as I did the first day we decided to work together, and then some. He has been my good friend, my confidant, my advisor, and my partner. I miss him terribly. I am sorry that I did not take time to give instructions to those who typically follow me. I would have liked to think that they would trues my last instructions and follow the current path (to follow James) until the next word they heard from me. I can only say that early in the game RL kept James from spending enough time with the team , particularly the new members. But as I said before, I could have made better decisions without the influence of substances.
I know a lot of people have made a big deal about other issues presented here. These were all between ME AND JAMES before that day, and NO ONE else's business. Again, I apologize that this INTERNAL matter got brought to the EXTERNAL forum. That was not my choice, and in fact, I asked the original poster NOT TO POST IT. Now me and James may never work this out or be friends agian. ANd I will probably never play this game again. I made many friends around the world and had tons of fun playing, but it never seems to be worth the lost of the few that really, really, matter.
Love, for the last time, and finally, mother to no one,
RX