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The Rho Reporter
The twentieth of March, 2012
EXTRA! EXTRA!
EVICTION NOTICE-OMNIPOTENTLY VICTORIOUS!
WINNERS OF RHO IN RECORD TIME!
The twentieth of March, 2012
EXTRA! EXTRA!
EVICTION NOTICE-OMNIPOTENTLY VICTORIOUS!
WINNERS OF RHO IN RECORD TIME!
With nearly 24million ABP, Eviction Notice proves the value of their “KILL KILL KILL” technique, elementary as it may be. After crumbling alliance after alliance and recruiting the cream of the crop in Rho, EN’s incredible leadership, and superior organizational skills create the perfect recipe for success.
Three cheers for EN!
HOORAY HOORAY HOORAY!!!
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IN OTHER NEWS:
EVERYONE ELSE-GOOD GAME, AND THANKS FOR PLAYING!
HOORAY HOORAY HOORAY!!!
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IN OTHER NEWS:
EVERYONE ELSE-GOOD GAME, AND THANKS FOR PLAYING!
Honorable Mention goes to Virus for their valiant effort, and amusing taunts! If it weren’t for EN, they may have infected Rho entirely.
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TIME TO CRACK OPEN A COLD BEER AND BASK IN THE GLORY!
TIME TO CRACK OPEN A COLD BEER AND BASK IN THE GLORY!
But winning wasn’t as easy as they may have made it look! Not only were EN first to successfully construct 4 world wonder monuments with ease, they were the first and only alliance to build all 7!!! To continue to add to the awe, EN managed to build all 7 of those incredible monuments in Grepolis record-breaking time, according to knowledgeable sources. Worn out from the victory, EN began to sit back and relax waiting for their opportunity on another server.
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MEANWHILE, NEAR THE WESTERN RIM OF RHO…
A green eyed monster, full of envy for EN’s swift victory began to try and exact revenge-even though the time had long expired for a power move against the great Eviction Notice.
Eviction Notice was full from their feast! They managed to evict tenants from nearly 6,000 cities!! TCC Cartoon, led by USSPADDLEBOAT and Mara1, had managed a whopping 1500. What a war machine TCC was! They took their biggest pride in eating inactive cities and claiming “war” on EN’s 10-15 active western players. Rambo76239 had been taught the ways of the ninja by Kronnoss, and with the help of several TCC Cartoon players, made his way into their team chat-posing as a lowly player named MCD0. While in the chat, he remained quiet; he was a fly on the wall of their teamspeak server.
<12:02:49> "christov23": just noticed he colonized there
<12:03:00> "-=juxo=-": ok
<12:03:01> "christov23": i think
<12:03:11> "christov23": but we dont need that WW anyway
<12:03:18> "christov23": we still have the Statue
<12:03:24> "-=juxo=-": yes but is sucks anyway
<12:03:29> "christov23": yeah man
<13:02:59> "MCD0": we cant win with only one ww
<13:03:39> "Voy": no?
<13:06:22> "MCD0": no
<13:06:37> "Voy": ohw.. and now?
<13:08:28> "Voy": how many WW we must build then?
<13:11:43> "MCD0": 4
<13:11:55> "MCD0": 4 first
<13:17:05> "Voy": ah oke, but if we want to win then we must build them first to level 10 before the others that do, isn't it?
<14:14:22> "jill": hey
<14:16:03> "MCD0": yeah
<14:16:19> "jill": juxo just posted a spy report rene
<14:17:26> "jill": mcd0 nice to meet you
After Johnsarah1’s perfectly executed TCC wonder-bust, the Cartoons were discussing the loss of their monument in team speak. After seeing Christy23’s blatant ignorance, Rambo spoke up and informed the wannabe the requirements to win the world. To his surprise, and long-lived delight, USSPADDLEBOAT, the fearlessly incapable leader of TCC Cartoon, had no idea how to even win Rho. What a calamity! Still oblivious of their infiltration, USSPADDLEBOAT began sending jealousy filled messages to the leaders of Eviction Notice as they began to close in on their victory with the completion of the 5th, 6th, and 7th WW monuments. Mr. PADDLEBOAT sure had a lot to say, and boy-o-boy was he a tough guy!
Shortly followed by EN’s success and TCC Cartoon’s childish outburst of resentment via PM, the haters’ hate began to spill onto the external forums-a place that TCC’s players were completely unknown. Drunk, high, ignorant, or all three, no one can be sure-a few players began making very very broad statements of libel against Eviction Notice and their credibility as skilled players. As if the 7 wonders in record Grepolis time, 6,000 cities, 24,000,000 ABP, and 10 busted enemy wonders weren’t enough proof for the wannabes known as TCC Cartoon; Sworn enemies, and self-proclaimed EN haters even came to defend against the hollow claims! Having already felt the full force of Eviction Notice in all their glory, EN had gained the respect of many of their enemies, and it was plain as day for all to see in the forums!
I-N-C-R-E-D-I-B-L-E!!!!
So, keep it up TCC. Keep running your mouths. We’ve already won. You can have our left overs, the only cities that really matter are on the 7 islands nestled neatly out of enemy CS range in O44 Real men say good game when they’re defeated, the same way that many Virus, HoH, and EVO players already have.
If you’re lucky enough you may stir up an encore, and bring EN to another island near you. You cartoons don’t seem to know what you’re talking about. We are the Grepolis equivalent of video game playing kittens, you are the equivalent of feeble children who get beat by video game playing kittens. Lol, stupid edit.
BUT WAIT!!!
Before you lash out again with your statistically unsupported rants…
How many wonders did the colorful bunch of Cartoons successfully complete?
ZERO! ZILCH! NONE! NADA!
How many wonders did TCC bust?
NAUGHT! NIL! SQUAT! ZILCH!
So remember boys and girls: Don’t throw rocks at a tank.
Thanks for subscribing to the Rho Reporter-Your Grepo-info authority on wannabes and their fireships, champs and their WW’s, and everything in between.
(EDITOR’S NOTE: For the intellectually challenged, or those that are just lacking a basic knowledge of creationism Mara1 is referring to Boedha1. Mara is to Buddha what Satan is to Jesus. Through many talks with USSPADDLEBOAT, I have come to understand that much of my humor and vocabulary are far above his level of comprehension. That leads me to believe that the rest of the cartoons are probably equally slow, and it’s the blind leading the blind, or he’s just a pee-brain and is probably the grepo-leader equivalent of a three toed sloth, and his followers are just too lazy or unskilled to get along without him. I want to ensure that this is understood and enjoyed to the fullest extent by all involved.)
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